Friday, October 27, 2017

A Woman

He told me that I am not anything
If I am not a woman
But I am a woman ,I said
I have a vagina, two breasts

No, you are not
You have a mind of your own
That’s the anomaly
You reason, You speak
You are not submissive
You are not helpless
You are not dependent
How can you be a woman?

I am  very much a woman
I am my own self,
How God intended
Not how you want to mend it

The woman whose mind you fear
Whose reason you know is better
Whose voice much powerful
Whom you have to fetter
Or else she will rise above
And drown you in her deluge
You have to use your brute strength
How else will you have the woman?








Monday, July 3, 2017

The Dog Who Ate Air




Today when Rajesh’s little son asked for a puppy as a birthday gift he readily bought him one. He didn’t have the heart to say no. Malti, his wife was surprised at the quick recapitulation. At night she asked him about it. “I didn’t want him to feel that we didn’t understand his need. I know how it is to how it feels when you realise that the world is not a fairy tail after all”, Rajesh was smiling and thinking aloud “These kids are not innocent like we were”. “This is still more perplexing”, thought Malti, “Why are you smiling while mouthing such heavy words?” Rajesh meanwhile had gone back in time to the when he was a three year old kid fondly known as Raju.

He remembered looking longingly at the cute white puppy that Col. Gupta’s son was walking along with their sahayak. Raju was an impish looking boy with light eyes and golden hair; he had a certain endearing air about him. Everybody just fell in love with his smile and incessant innocent questions yet he was also a very naughty kid who could be very dogged if he decided to.

“But why can’t we have a dog too?” He asked Dad the umpteenth time. They had just come downt o lift from their 6th floor flat in the housing society where they lived. It was a gated society in the busy city of Kolkota, mostly inhabited by Army personnel and a few Air Force officers. Dad again told him that a flat was not appropriate place to keep a pet but as usual he was at his adamant best.

Trying to convince the boy he asked, “Who will take him for a walk? You are very small.”  “Why don't we also get an orderly? Are you not an officer too?” Raju almost whined, “He can walk the dog with me”. Dad just kept walking thinking of a possible solution to this problem knowing that something had to be done soon. What he feared happened that same evening. Ma informed Dad that the boy had had neither breakfast nor lunch and dinner also was going to go waste as far as Raju was concerned. A declaration had been given that food would be partaken only and only when a puppy is brought to the house. ‘The Hunger Strike’ was on.

It was a serious event by all measures. A hyperactive boy, Raju ate to his heart’s fill normally. His remaining hungry, was a near impossible, really worrisome, catastrophic event for Ma. This went on for two days. Not only Ma but Dad also had to give up. “Ok! I’ll bring a puppy for you soon”, Dad exclaimed with exasperation. It was a major victory for Raju and hence the strike was broken with his favourite rajma chawal. Ma too had a sigh of relief.

Finally his wait was over and dad brought a beautiful puppy home. Its coat was jet black and shiny and it had a red bow on top of its head. Raju tied a string around its neck and proudly took it for a walk. He named it Blacky.

Blacky proved to be an extremely obedient pet. He didn't bark unnecessarily, didn't ask for food and didn’t even ask to pee. He walked very easily on the leash and was happy be steered in any direction. Mom and granny also were apparently happy with Blacky. Raju thought to himself, “Dad was worried without cause, mom doesn't say anything and granny is almost unaware of Blacky’s presence.” However he sometimes wondered why Blacky didn’t eat anything? Didn’t dogs need food to grow up?”

A few days later they were playing when Shyam his friend pulled hard at Blacky’s bow. After that however hard Raju tried the dog just wouldn’t bark. Ma was not at home and it was so perplexing for Raju that he decided to take him to Doctor Uncle who lived on the same floor. Unfortunately Ramu the doc’s servant opened the door and started laughing when Raju told him about Blacky’s ailment. “And what does he eat?” Ramu sniggered. “He eats air” Raju answered, “Every evening I tie him outside in the balcony at 7.00 for him to have his dinner.” Ramu laughed still louder, “Look it doesn’t even have legs. They are only wheels”, Ramu said holding his jiggling stomach while laughing. By this time other children had also gathered around and everyone started making fun of the poor boy.

Crying loudly and still holding Blacky to his chest he went running back. Ma was just back from the market. “Why doesn’t Blacky have legs?” he asked innocently. Tears were streaming down red cheeks when he related everything that had happened at Doctor Uncle’s home. Ma just looked at him and didn’t know how to explain. She was at a loss for words and tried soothing his nerves by distracting him. “Dad will explain everything when he is back”, she said.

While waiting for Dad ,he observed other dogs from the balcony and suddenly the realisation dawned upon him. He understood it all, this time he will not be fooled by a plastic toy which had wheels for legs and ate air. It was time again for the hunger strike regimen

“How times change”, Malti smiled warmly at her still endearing husband and they both went to have a look at Gaurav sleeping beside his new “toy”.




Thursday, June 22, 2017

Silent Tears

Life’s silent tears
Festering and unhealing
Causing eternal lacerations
Which fill eyes with dry salt
Love’s but a ghost
Eluding yet haunting
Chasing coloured-paper dreams
Which crumple sleeplessly





Thursday, April 6, 2017

Escape #AtoZBloggingChallenge letter #E




That slanting rooftop in the sun
Where slipping out from the rails
I leaned basking in the sun
And escaped from the world

From things that mattered to most
The gossiping aunts and uncles
From cacophony of cousins shouting
 The mundane and the routine

The  young green slopes in waves
The cascading sparkle of water
A slim road winding down the hill
And  tall pines branches beckoning

Those memories of years gone by
Oftentimes fondle my weary heart
When there's no escaping now
From the gray jungles of concrete


Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Damned #AtoZBloogingChallenge letter #D










Every scar tells a damned story
A story which supposed her guilty
Guilty  she was only of loving
Loving unconditionally, giving

Giving each particle of her being
Her being systemically shattered
Shattered with  deeds and words
Words that bore deeper wounds

Wounds, bloodied red ugly stamps
Stamps marring her body and soul
Soul that loved was raked by terror
Terror blindsiding love left scarred








Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Courage #AtoZBloggingChannel




Following a  loose theme of things that have had an impact on my life

They say you have been brave
Yet I have also failed at times
I too have cried alone,  scared
To face the world on my own

A loving whisper, a stirring word
A warm smile, a touching caress
A stern rebuke or a bear hug
Sometimes brings courage to you

All you need is a belief in self and
Love and peace to see you through
And people who have faith in you
Who care enough to be with you




Monday, April 3, 2017

Brownish Blackish #AtoZBloggingChallenge #B

My take on the prejudice faced by majority of Indian girls as the beauty standards in our country are still governed by colonial mindset



Brownish or blackish
Or maybe wheatish
My skin is honey golden
Or maybe a dusky gold

Whatever it's tone
It is just  not enough
Because beauty is white
Brown only ugly and dark

Pristine cold plastic
The white is idolised
Coloured real warm
The brown stands ignored




Saturday, April 1, 2017

Ambition #AtoZBloggingChallenge






In setting the course of our life we forget to live life like it was meant to be. In following the fish eye we forget the beauty that's scattered around us.




He said,, let's go
We are set on course
Let's achieve that pinnacle
I will guide your path
My dreams, yours, ours
Let's  focus on that fish eye

I said, please stop
Let's take in the scene
Resist the relentless push
I want to make some art
My dreams are mine, not ours
I wish to enjoy the journey too





Sunday, March 12, 2017

ये शहर




मेरी सब शरारतों का गवाह  
मेरी उम्र से बस कुछ ही बड़ा 
इसकी बाँहों में खेली मैं बढ़ी  
इसकी राहों पे गिरी और संभली

ये मेरे बचपन का दोस्त 
ये मेरी जवानी का साथी 
इसके फूलों की खुशबू मेरी 
इसके पतझर के रंग मेरे अपने

हर मोड़ में कोई किस्सा सुहाना 
हर ईमारत में मेरा हिस्सा पुराना
इसकी हवाएं मेरी कहानी बांचती
इसके पानियों में मेरे दर्द के घोल 
 ये शहर मुझे भूल नहीं पायेगा 
मेरे दिल सा ही तो है ये शहर 

Thursday, March 9, 2017

Again Found



A season  of delight
In a life full of woes
A rainbow of smiles
In the  dreary greyness
I drown and yet am ashore
Inundated in a deluge of joy 


Your  sparkle makes me 

New and resplendent 
Your fragrance makes me
Fresh and redolent of love
I die and  yet am reborn 
Entangled in the threads of life


Aroused by the mere touch 

Of your fingers on my skin
Scalded by the bare  heat 
Of your glaze on my face
I am burned and yet soothed
Rekindled by the again-found love













Sunday, November 6, 2016

Miracle


I found you again
Like a shell in the sand

Which a small girl buried
Chanced upon after years

Jagged and rough
Marred by time and men
My life's edges fit in your's
A smooth whole is formed

My lost faith restored
A nebulous vista revealed
My hidden treasure discovered
You are my miracle



Friday, October 21, 2016

My North Pole Trip; A story by Bikram Singla, my 2nd grade student




   

It was the first adventure of my life . I bought three tickets from Delhi to North Pole. We three friends were very enthusiastic. During the flight all I could think was the fun we will have.  When we landed we went to our igloo. We wore the arctic suits. We hung our bags,I slung my camera around my neck and we set off to explore. There was only snow everywhere around. I and my friends clicked photos with Polar Bears and penguins. We decided to celebrate the rest of place in next morning.

Then I took out my GPS and looked for a restaurant. Then we went  there and ate food. We went back to our igloo and slept tight. In the morning my friends and I went to a coffee shop and drank hot coffee. It was such a relief in such cold. But we didn't know that worse things were on the wait for us.  

 As we set out excitedly on our trek we heard a splash and a cry. As I looked back Mehul was thrashing his hands about neck deep in icy water. He had slipped on thin ice covering a lake and it had broken. We pulled him out with the help of some men. He was shivering with cold. We took him back and I gave him some dry clothes to wear. He fell ill with high fever and had to be taken back. Our trip was cut short and we landed in Delhi next day.

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Beginning

Let's take to the road
Make a new beginning
Walk side by side, hand in hand
up the verdant winding hill-path

Let's spot the snowy peaks
Cry out in joy, sit by the lake
The waters bright like your eyes
The skies crimson in the Suns wake

My love! Let's go
Leaving the world behind
Don't ask me where,
I don't want to decide

Sunday, July 17, 2016

Renewal

The noise is transforming
New rhythms returning
My heart beating anew
The melody is trickling in

The sky is brightening up
No longer dull and grey
My eyes shining again
The sun is peeping through

The storm is calming down
Not threatening to engulf
A smile on my lips
The horizon drifting in sight

Sunday, June 12, 2016

Just Yet




Let's curl up on the sofa
Hook our arms together
My head on your shoulder
Eyes half closed half open
Let the kettle boil and sing
I don't want to stir just yet


Let's sit in the balcony
Count the stars in the sky
Wine glasses in our hands
Half empty and half full
Let the breeze kiss our lips
I don't want to sleep just yet

Let's sleep on this morning,
My body cocooned in yours 
Our feet together toes touching
Your breath on my face and hair
Dreams dreamt and undreamt
I don't want to wake up just yet





Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Of Love and Life



Thoughts that I never thought
Would come to my mind
Smiles that I had lost
To the depths of eternity
Love that I had locked away
With memories in an old box

All return like His grace
A potent life giving force
A light that eternally brightened
The darkest nooks of my heart
Restored the love that I had lost
And the faith that I had given up on

Life took me to many places
But the corner of my heart
Which sought the balm of love
Was most often barren and dark
Now I have come to a magic land
And the sparkle in my eyes says yes


Sunday, April 10, 2016

Hope #AtoZchallenge #H



Like the pink burst of the Attacama
Hope just needs a shower of love


The dormant buds buried under

Then flower into a bright hue


The vast waste seemingly eternal

Transforms into a garden of happiness









Friday, April 8, 2016

Forgotten #AtoZ challenge #F


From the same tree born 
From the same seed grown 
One given all shade and nurtured
Other left to languish deserted
A shallow reason they had
You won’t carry our name, they said 

That was an excuse so flimsy
They always were in the sway
Of partisan mindset and thought
That taught them to discriminate 
Should they be forgiven again as ever?
And then perhaps be forgotten forever?

On the eve of the great 9 day Indian festival where the female form of God will be worshiped and her designated corporal forms, the kanyas or virgin girls will be venerated for eight days I feel uneasy. Such a paradox for a society which does not respect its women in the normal social milieu. I am not berating the ritual of kanya pujan but then girls should always be viewed with respect and cherished, why just 9 days twice a year?

Parents dont give daughters their right to education and property. Husbands mistreat wives. widows have no place in the social structure, they are simply persona non-grata. Women themselves abuse and exploit other women. Girls are trafficked, sexually exploited and tortured. Rapes are on the rise and dignity of all women at stake. Female infanticide and foeticide are menaces which we haven't been able to curb despite grave efforts.

Equality for the girl child and not episodic elevation to Goddess status is what is the need of the hour.
A change in mentality, an approach supported by effective laws and their implementation is the need of the hour and as always it would first begin with family, the first unit of socialisation. We don't need pseudo-feminist here who educate their daughters and buy them beautiful dresses, we need people who will educate their children so that they get rid of the society of its bias towards men and male gender by educating their children and specially men. Pink and blue, Barbie and Batman, Dolls and toy guns, Kitchen and playhouse....lets remove the signs...


Thursday, April 7, 2016

Expression #E #Atoz challenge





My poems are words

Which meant for someone

The whole world reads

And I only hope they reach

That soul's cosmic realms

When they beat in human 
hearts

Creative expression primarily and emotional expression, both are necessary for lightening the burdens of your mind. I love expressing myself through my writing; poetry primarily. Not expressing myself at the right time has caused havoc in life so many times that now I wouldn’t let an opportunity pass. However it does not mean that I have learnt to express hurt. I can express anger but hurt still flows with silent tears. I am still learning to say something when I am hurt instead of going quiet.
Songs, poems, lyrics and music are a superb way of expressing yourself. Its important that you tell others what you feel. Lack of expression and articulation leads to suppressed emotions and that leads to depression. When Raman passed away I couldn’t express myself for some time. Probably that was why I was fainting repeatedly on his funeral yet my poems have given me the strength and fortitude to face the ordeal and chin up.




Wednesday, April 6, 2016

Drama #AtoZ challenge # D




People indulge in lots of it and I find it futile except when it is the literary kind. I get exhilarated by Shakespeare, Marlowe and Shaw but the usual family or couple dramas, reel or real, God Save Me! I tend to switch off and shift my attention to something more informative. 
These days even news has drama.  Certain journalists think they are film actors spouting innate emotional phrases or political leaders shouting nationalist dialogues. Why do people indulge in such useless pursuits is something I fail to understand.

I have tried to analyse various situations and come to the conclusion that it’s either guilt we try to assuage or be righteous. Also sometimes it is the fear of losing a loved one after we have committed a mistake that we presume may have repercussions.

We are social people, we thrive on relationships and they make or mar us. Why don’t we come clean and be truthful in our closest relationships; either because we are afraid to lose them or they become frustrating. Wouldn’t it be less hurtful if a spouse came up clean on cheating episodes and asked for forgiveness (in that case first they should decide whether they want to keep up the pattern or be faithful) rather than calling the cheated upon spouse names and blaming them for  something they hadn’t done?  Again Wouldnt it be saving the situation if different generations in a family sat down together and resolved various family issues and came over generation gaps. We do that in our work scenarios, we deliberately avoid conflict and sullen faces till the situation gets out of hand. We even tend to resolve the situation by negotiating and without raising our voices because we know that our livelihood is at stake. Yet at home or during social situations we lose our cool and indulge in this drama because we take them for granted.

Drama should be kept for movies and stage. Relationships are tender and precious , drama is not a genre for them, meaningful communication is a better tool. A warm hug, a nod of  understanding, a loving look, a friendly smile and things get better!!!!