Tuesday, June 5, 2018

The Moth Eaten Moon

A slow waning moon
Losing shape and light
Not attracting the sea now
Shushed by endless whispers


Worry lines etched all over
A moth eaten frayed arc
Among dark fearful clouds
Falling down the dark abyss

Wednesday, April 25, 2018

Voids #V, #AtoZChallenge



Some voids don’t fill up
They always gape wide

A wound left unsealed
Like a hole in the heart

An empty searing pain
A silent tearing cry

She wakes up lonely
Even her tears are dry


Unlearn #U, #AtoZChallenge


Ye Women!please heed
You are not property
Nor just a thing
You are a living being

Not mother not sister
Daughter or a wife
You are a woman too
And a right to live

Unlearn your roles
Unlearn your mores
Sacrifice, care and compromise
Come after your own self

Tuesday, April 24, 2018

Temerity #T, #AToZChallenge


Short clothes
Late nights
Booze and smoke
All alone
What temerity

You ask for it
Then say NO
How do I understand
Been the boss
Never heard no

Old or little
Woman or girl
Old or young
Women are chattel
Sold and bought

Milked dry
Happy or wry
It doesn’t matter
You have no voice
Rape is your destiny

Home or jungle
Stranger or known
A woman is to be had
Why such hue and cry
What temerity!

Saturday, April 21, 2018

Single #S, #AtoZChallenge



Are you married
When are you going to
Are you unhappy
Oh!He ditched you

Don't want children
Are your parents Ok
Are you Divorced
Are you widowed

Sorry, Its a couple thing
Hey you will be all alone
How do I set you a place
Who will buy you drinks

A husband has a roving eye
A wife is dissatisfied
Lets pair you up c'mon
All will be well then

Stop! I don't want your advice
Nor sympathy, neither malice 
I have chosen this life
I am single by choice 






Friday, April 20, 2018

The Rose Garden #R , #AtoZchallenge

Mom called the backyard Dad's rose-garden. It was a small plot of land at the back of the house. Everything but roses grew in that wild space. Weeds, long grasses, bushes of wild plants.Nobody actually had the time to take care of the plot. 

Dad always intended to. He had grand plans. He wanted it to be a beautiful garden with a manicured lawn and landscaped beds of roses. He was only a planner. Mom executed most of his plans and they made a great team. Gardening though was not her cup of tea.

Dad wanted to have his morning tea in that rose-garden sitting on a white wicker chair with a round glass top table. He had always planned to read his newspaper and sip his earl grey with cheese crackers. He also planned to listen to his music in the evenings there while having a drink or two.

Shruti, their daughter was the passive listener to all his plans. She wondered often as to why he didn't hire a gardener and get it done with. One day she asked mom. "He wants to do it himself. Its his retirement plan", said mom. She was as usual dismissive of the idea, even ridiculing it.


That day Shruti sweated all day stoically to remove the weeds and sow the grass. She manicured the flower beds, planted rose bushes of all types. The flowers will bloom in spring and all beds will have different coloured  roses. A set of white cane table and chairs was brought in. Then she spread his ashes all over the Rose Garden. The earl grey was steeping in the tea pot, so were the tears in the two women's eyes.


Thursday, April 19, 2018

Quest #Q #AtoZChallenge


My quest has only just begun
Life has never been frolic and fun
Yet I am still to find myself

The grind has taken its toll
Tired ,I want to chuck it all
And look for the reason I exist

I know I want to do it alone
My journey is mine and mine alone
All fetters I want to now break

I may fail to find anything
The travails may prove nothing
Yet I hope to find the lost me

Wednesday, April 18, 2018

Patriarchal Bargain #P, #AtoZchallenge




Shush! He will hear you shout
Girls don't speak so loud
Don't even ask to go out
Girls don't roam without
Look pretty, look demure
Wear certain clothes to allure



Mom herself only whispered
Her voice they never heard
They were happy when she cooked
And her trip to home was booked
it was a happy bargain made
Saved her life and upped her grade 

My college sojourn had to be won
With a promise of indiscretion none
No men, no love , no outing , no joy
Get educated and we will find a boy
I was told to get home on time
Never think of being behind the chime

Then they all wait for Their turn
For another woman to boss on
To enjoy the fruits of their bargain
And over the house they reign
After years they are up a notch
In this hierarchy gone debauch 






Patriarchal bargain is a term coined by Turkish author and researcher Deniz Kandiyoti in 1988, which describes a tactic in which a woman chooses to accommodate and uphold patriarchal norms, accepting gender roles that disadvantage women overall but maximizing her own power and options. (Wikipedia). So they end up compromising collective good for individual gains.

Tuesday, April 17, 2018

Outrage #O #AToZChallenege




Outrage
Of Modesty
Of freedom
Of liberty
Of innocence
Of beliefs
Of life

And then we create
a useless 
outrage of words

Monday, April 16, 2018

Normal #N, #AtoZ Challenge



I work
Earn Money
Don’t keep house
And like all men
Demand my rest

I like a drink or two
And like dining out
No I don’t smoke
And like all else
That’s also a choice

I stay up late
Wake up late
Stay out late
That’s also a choice
Norms are not for me

Your normal is suffocating
Your normal is demeaning
I am happy with my normal
Your rebel is my normal
My me is my normal 

Sunday, April 15, 2018

Mirage #M, #AtoZChallenge


She kept walking
In the desert of life
Looking for a stream
Searching love and life

An arduous journey
No life giving elixirs
No magical oases
No songbirds singing

She still walked on
Taking everything on
Looking for a sign
Running after a mirage

Friday, April 13, 2018

Let me be! #L, #AtoZChallenge


Would you let me be?
All my lovely well wishers
My presumed life keepers
Who disappear when needed!

Would you let me be?
Neighbors, relatives, friends
Who bitch and yet pretend
To be my loving guardian angels!

Would you let me be?
Those animal-men of prey
Who eye just flesh and bone
Crushing the broken heart I own!

I tell you; let me be!
I am happy on my own
My sorrows mine alone
A journey yet too arduous and long!


Thursday, April 12, 2018

Keepers at home (oikourous) #K, #AtoZChallenge

Are you Oikourous, Keepers at home, homemaker, workers at home?
Do you manage your household duties well?
Do you take good care of your household?
Well if you are then you are certainly justifying this word which has been only used Once in The Holy Bible. You are a Godly woman.


Oikourous, is a Greek word which means keepers at home.  The Bible says that women should be keepers at home. In older times good Christian women were advised  by the church to stay at home , look after the children and house and obey their husbands. Though there are examples where women were engaged in various occupational and economic activities yet mostly it was interpreted that the role of the woman is confined to household duties. Later it was adapted to suit working ladies as keepers OF home not AT home. Meaning they could work outside given that they do not neglect their duties at home. I am surprised that even today Amazon has as best sellers books which prescribe a curriculum for Godly women to teach their daughters the tips and tricks of being good wives and mothers.

The word may be Greek and used in the Bible but almost every culture has a similar theory. All cultures suggest and perpetrate the theory that women are nurturers and keepers and their foremost duty is to keep the home and hearth healthy.

In India and many South Asian cultures as well as the Arab world women are still relegated to housework; unpaid, unending and thankless. Rural women also take on farming, looking after the animals and looking for firewood. Only a minuscule section of very highly earning women living in ultra modern cities can yet afford to put up their feet as soon as they are home and order food. The condition of lower class women is still worse. They work as maids and servants n homes and shops, then go back home and fulfill their housekeeping duties and then wait for their drunkard husbands to come home and beat them and take away all their earnings.

It has been observed that women in India make only 27% of the working force. Those who work mostly take on both; paid jobs and unpaid housekeeping.  Don’t be taken in with the numbers though. Chinese women make 64% of the work force yet they also take on double duties.

So be it any culture women are burdened with houseeeping duties regardless of class or income group. The house and the children are their prime responsibility, the husband if helps does so grudgingly or will only handle the financial and shopping for the groceries part. Thechildren don’t help either.
The family members need to help each other run the house. Times have changed. We are no longer hunter gatherers or early farmers. Women are just not nurturers, they are as human as all the men. Women can work in all areas and do wonders. They can be equal earning members and add to the economical productivity of the country and the world. To achieve this they have to be relieved of this burden. The responsibility also should be shared.

The husband needs to help even if the wife is not working because this work is monotonous and back breaking as well as emotionally stressful. They need to take care of their wives physical and emotional health.

May be the men should be Oikourous too the keepers of/at home. The word is not gender specific after all. Equality may well begin at home too.

Wednesday, April 11, 2018

Jezebel #J, #AtozChallenge






Her own Gods
Her own idols
She refused to decline

She plotted murder
She instigated prophets 
Built temple and shrine






She propelled her man
She fought for his kingship
Stood forever by his side

She stood her ground
She died like a queen
They christened her whore

The Jezebel of Israel
Died thousands years ago
Yet Jezebels die today too

Queen Jezebel of Israel was considered a dominating , scheming and murderous harlot. She refused to give up her Phoenician beliefs and idolatry after her political marriage to King Ahaab. In turn she convinced him to worship her God Baal. She was hated by Israelites, the followers of Yahweh, who, they considered The only God.
She held on to her beliefs till she was killed by Jehu, an army commander after a couple and thrown to the dogs.
As she chose to dress up like a queen and painted her eyes and face ,it was believed by some that she tried to ensnare Jehu with her charm this forever associating her name with prostitution and harlotry, without any concrete proof. 

I personally believe that she was akin to our modern day women, probably the first woman who fought for her rights and died fighting for them. She chose make up as it was associated with dignity raising her above the ordinary women, making he appear the Queen that she was till the end. 

Today also women who have a voice, an opinion and who fight for their rights as mostly generalised as women with loose moral values, modern Jezebels. 




Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Infidelity #I, #AtoZChallenge


(Today I present a micro story. A micro story is a subset of flash fiction, a super short story in about 300 words. It still has all the story elements.) 




Amrita had it all planned. They were going to Goa for their anniversary as soon as Arun was back. Coming back they had parties lined up. It was going to be another busy but enjoyable  leave tenure for Arun. They were going to be together all the time. She hoped he liked the planning. She was so blissfully unaware of the havoc she was creating.

Arun was tired and wanted to rest. He didn’t even meet the kids properly. They were off to grandma’s. He didn’t get to spend time with his parents. Goa was hectic too. She was so dominating and demanding. He had loved her so much once. She was pretty and smart. He felt that he had the world at his feet. He didn’t know how things had come to this stage that he didn’t even want to look or speak to her. Many times he didn’t feel like coming home after his tenure at the rig was over.

Roma seemed like a whiff of perfume to his otherwise stinking life. She was happy, modern and lovely.  She was Amrita's best friend. Their children had grown up together. They celebrated everything together.  Even their respective marriages were going through the same cycle.

She had no demands only asking for his time, which he had plenty. He liked her verve and laughter. He called, they spoke. They walked with each other. Discussed music and literature. They had their secret pleasures. Each other’s presence made things tolerable now. They had discovered a special joy in this friendship. Life, marriages and the routine became tolerable.

That phone call on the landline made all hell break loose. Her husband heard them and beat her. He told Amrita. She was hysterical.

They both kept saying they were only friends but infidelity has no definitions.












Monday, April 9, 2018

Happiness #H, #AToZChallenge



The little girl wanted a ball
But she was handed a doll
She wanted a book to read
But was told to cook instead



Stay at home cook and clean
Your role is just behind the scene
Don’t try to raise your voice
There’s no weightage to your choice 


Eat only after all the men have
Till then ask your stomach to behave
Rise and shine before everyone else
Put up your feet after everyone has 

Your happiness lies only with them
Rest for you is a not on their list
Don’t fool yourself that you are someone
Simply get your duties dusted and done

Don’t give your poor heart any hope
Your own desires have no scope
A machine expected to give birth 
You are born to die without any mirth



Saturday, April 7, 2018

My Gang, #G, #AtoZChallenge




Friendship is a relationship that gets severely tested in case of women . We tend to let go of friends at a drop of a hat  on some trivial issues. Sometimes we just lose touch due to our busy lives in our marital homes nad at other times we get too involved in our spousal relations.

 I had done the same, forgotten some, lost some and ignored some. 

After I got married I simply got lost in a maze of family and relatives. Also my husband's friends became more important. I forgot my school and college friends or rather lost touch with most of them.


When my child grew up and I was out of the workforce for certain reasons I found time to look for them. I found some on  the then popular Orkut and Batchmates and then Facebook happened. Everyone found everyone and I jumped on the chance of organising a school reunion. (well that's a different tangent altogether)

After a few impromptu coffee meetings and two reunions, we found our gang. Like minded people who were either very close friends or acquaintances in school now formed a tightly knit group. 

We were a motley gang all different yet bound with a deep sense of friendship. People even laughed at the guys when they said that they were in a coffee kitty with 6 girls and 6 guys! A restaurant refused to give us kitty discount saying that they only gave it for ladies kitty! Sometimes it was just two of the men and rest all women and vice versa but we all gave two hoots about it. So much so that we had other schoolmates hankering after us for getting into the group. I must say spouses play a very important part and here the wives and the husbands got along too and we welcomed them with open hearts.

Its said that your friendships are tested in tough times. My friends stood by me like rocks.A few years down the line I lost my husband and my moorings in that order and they all rallied round me from that day on. They never let me feel that I was alone.

They supported me financially, psychologically and socially never ever making me feel burdened. Never did any of them leave me behind or forget to include me in their activities. Some activities were in fact planned specially for my benefit. They helped me stand on my feet, sending me business, references and sometimes even asking me to teach their kids. They counseled me, heard me out, guided me and They did it so subtly and so persistently that I finally found myself back again. They even visited me in the hospital when I was down with swine flu. 


When I found love again they were the first ones to endorse the relationship and encourage me. They were the only ones genuinely happy for me apart from my parents, brother and sister in law. Today this post is devoted to them all. My Gang. 



I miss you my friends, my people and know in my heart that you all are happy for me as I am for you!




Friday, April 6, 2018

Freedom #F, #AtoZChallenge


A Haiku is a Japanese origin poetry form with three lines and 17 syllables in order 5-7-5.
It usually describes an emotion with nature as the background. It is a strict form mainly due to its inherent brevity.




She soars in the sky
Freedom is a constant hope
Alive in her dream

Thursday, April 5, 2018

Eternity #E, #AtoZChallenge,



Sitting in the stark white hall with fluorescent lighting, Sureshan saw the scenes of his life flash by. School was a distant memory now. All Sureshan remembered  was a petite, fair and demure girl who always sat on the first bench. She laughed with a twinkle in her eyes and his heart missed a beat.

Theirs was one of the best schools in Mumbai.  The city’s rich and famous pulled all strings to get their kids into Scottish High. They both were privileged yet grounded. He found himself attracted to her simplicity and serene beauty.

A studious boy he didn’t indulge in the antics and pastimes of the rich spoilt brats. The great old school library was his haven. Now a tall, well built and handsome man, as a boy he was  shy but always had a pleasing personality topped with intellect and compassion.

He wanted to become a pilot in the Indian Air force and was focused on his goal right from the beginning. School and then NCC was his passion in that order. He followed both with devotion and became what he wanted to.

Last year when he had seen Ruchita in that coffee shop near the school all the memories had come flooding back. They were all here for the 8th reunion of their batch and Sureshan was attending it for the first time. Ruchita was still the same petite and demure girl. She had looked more sophisticated and stylish yet a little offbeat and too thin. “Must be dieting “, he had thought, “all young women these days took their fitness seriously, sometimes too seriously”.

He had suddenly felt butterflies in his stomach. He had been looking for this girl since he was commissioned. He was in love with her since school. He had always known where she lived when and was glad when he found out that her residence was still the same yet he didn’t have the guts to approach her.

In the coffee shop that day they just exchanged a hello and then were swept away by their respective friends. Amit, his best buddy had noticed the furtive glances of both.

He knew Ruchita well . He offered to help but told Sureshan that it won’t be easy. Sureshan was now flummoxed . “Why?”he asked.  Amit said, “ Ruchita herself will tell you.” 

A meeting was arranged. Parents met and the wedding date was decided. It was a fairy tale wedding on a cruise.

Today was their last day of honeymoon. Ruchita was crying and Sureshan was wiping her tears. “I told you it won’t be easy”, she said. “Who wants easy? I only want you”, joked Sureshan. Lets go and get it over with.

The ambulance was waiting at the airport. Her chemotherapy was to start immediately. She only had a year or so to live. He was prepared to love her for eternity.


His eternity was limited to the corners of her mouth when she smiled and the twinkle in her eye when he said I love you.

Wednesday, April 4, 2018

DayDreams #D, #AtoZChallenge


A warm wave in the cold dark sea
With undercurrents of bold heat
You have transformed my storm
Into a vibrant hued happy rainbow

A promise of sunshine and warmth 
Of blue skies,fair weather and love
You have unfurled my drooping sails
To steer me towards the horizon

A new course with promise of adventure
My vessel rises and falls with the waves
And you have roused in my barren heart
A daydream lasting for a whole lifetime 





The poem above is for my dear husband. He is the most important relationship in my life. He is someone who holds my ship steady and life in balance, someone who gave me so much love and care that I forgot all my troubles and who made me discover that life is not just struggle and strife. He is calm and a content man who has his head in the right place, a perfect foil for a volatile me.
Sometimes all the pain in your life is wiped off with a single loving kiss. I love you Navin for being my panacea.



Tuesday, April 3, 2018

Choice #C #AToZChallenge,


Nor the first choice even
before coming to the world
Choice is not a word for her
A mere tool that others use

She doesn't get to choose
Her clothes, her school
Her food, her husband
Her home, her vocation

She is chattel to be sold
Does that sound like cattle
Ask her, She even feels the
Same; beat, used and sold

Used like a farmhand
Cook, nurse, maid, whore
A son production unit, Again
Unable to choose a daughter








Monday, April 2, 2018

Belonging #B, #AtoZChallenge


No , she doesn’t own the house
Not the one she was born in
It’s her home but not her house
They said she will have her’s soon

But turns out, that too isn’t her house
She is the home maker yet
It’s his house, he owns it
Now he is dead and she is out

The farm she tills till her back breaks
The house she runs and slogs over
The shop she helps in, morning to evening
Nothing is hers, she doesn’t own it





This poem above is the story of women all over the world.

Inheritance and property rights give women the power and agency to assert themselves.  In a 2012 poll of gender specialists around the world, India was voted the worst G20 country in which to be a woman. It was ranked worse than Saudi Arabia, where women can’t legally drive and were only allowed to vote for the first time in 2015. (https://www.theguardian.com/world/2016/oct/08/india-divorce-man-cruelty-western-thought-in-laws.
 It’s important that not just laws but custom and social practices are also scrutinised and change be brought about to truly empower women all over the world.
The homes they are born in and build should also belong to them

Sunday, April 1, 2018

Abused #A #AtoZChallenge



Finger prints on her cheeks
Red shadows around her eyes
Nails tattooed on her back
And a plastic smile on her lips

A scarf to cover the “love” marks
Some foundation for the bites
A pill for the noise in her head
And a soothing salve for the bruises

The night’s footprints covered
With a morning of apologies
She gets up again and begins
Her daily drudgery of life

Hoping for a single elusive
Night of peace and sleep

Hoping to find courage
to break these fetters and fly 


Monday, March 19, 2018

Conversations Galore #AtoZChallenge


#ATOZChallenge #ThemeReveal

My first wholehearted attempt this year at the A-Z challenge and I have decided a theme which isn’t at all unique but is nonetheless a burning one.


Women and their Relationships

Women and their relationships: with themselves, their significant others, their children, families, there work and nature. It goes without saying that it will be mainly in context of Indian Women ( Women around me, known to me and women I have been able to observe and maybe sometimes about myself)

Women around the world have come a long way, still there’s a longer way to go. Within this struggle we have always held on to our traditional roles while making new roles our own. 
This juxtaposition and the changes it has brought about as well as the changes still needed, will be the main ideas I would be dealing with.

Posts may be in the form of poems, stories or just an article. The style may be satiric, romantic and even humorous but always with a feminist bias.


So wish you happy reading and blogging dear fellow bloggers, my followers and general reader. I will consider this exercise successful if it impacts even a single person.



Monday, March 12, 2018

Ghar

उसका घर मुझे नहीं अपनाता
उसके लोग मेरे नहीं हैं 
वो मेरा घर नहीं है
मेरा घर भी मेरा नहीं था
ऐसे तो क्या वो मेरा नहीं है?
या फिर मैं ही कभी किसी की नहीं हूँ?

Zakhm

मेरे ज़ख्मों का होना
उनकी समझ के परे है
सिर्फ कह देना की हाँ
हम समझते है बहुत नहीं है
मैं अपेक्षा भी नहीं रखती अब
के उन्हें दिखे वह रेखा जो
मेरे गाल पे मुझे महसूस होती है
अब कुरेदने से भी डरती हूँ जिसे
वो कैसे जानोगे के क्यों
वहां बाजू पे अब तक भी
काँच किरचता है सूखे ज़ख्म में
जब मैं खुद नहीं जानती क्यों